Saturday, September 13, 2008

Nursing Update

I am starting to really feel the effect of nursing school as as a result I have been a terrible blogger but honestly besides studying and spending a few precious moments with my family I have had NO, none, zilch, zero TIME! In the past, I have tried to keep my blog somewhat upbeat but for the sake of "keeping it real" I'm not going to sugar coat two years of nursing school. I am stressed to the max and I know that it is only going to get worse. Some days I feel like banging my head on the sign above but I restrain myself and just go for a run instead and I have found running to be a sanity saver.

Mixed in with the days that I wish I was home with Carson and wondering why I am choosing to go to school are days that feel pretty good. For example: the day we were getting checked off on blood pressures (bp) we were practicing on a fake arm to prepare for our test with the instructor. Our teacher had us line up single file and wait to take the bp. Well, I was almost at the end of the line and my classmates would go to read the bp and come back to the end of the line! So naturally after four or five classmates failed, I got more nervous thinking that I wasn't going to pass the first time either. Well, let me tell you not only did I pass the first time but I read the bp exactly! My teacher even gave me a high five! I felt like a champ that day! It is times like that that make me think, hey maybe this isn't so bad.

I am starting my fifth week and I have mixed feelings about school. I really stress because I know that I will have peoples lives in my hands so I am taking school serioulsy trying to do all I can. I think that is is working because some classmates have commented on how confident I am (I told them that I was a good actress) and a few of them have even asked for me to help them get organized or how to do an assignment, etc.

With that said, I am really having a hard time transitioning to not being home with Carson. I am also struggling to "do it all." The other day I was complaining to Andrew about something non-school related that I didn't want to do to do and his comment to me was, "All I know is that the OLD Tiffani would do it." His comment pretty much sums it up, I really can't do it all anymore and that is hard for me to handle because I like to be "super" mom, friend, child, etc. So something has got to give, when I figure out what it is, I'll let you know.

random old school nursing picture, but what's a post without some pictures?!

Back to school, to say that I am learning a ton would be an understatement. Every day blurrs together with never ending reading just to get by in addition to watching ancient videos, take home assignments and written reports. I Next week especially is going to be rough because we have to prep. for our first patient Wednesday and write a patho. on their nursing diagnosis, a care plan, research ALL of their current medications including why they are taking them, what they are for and what the expected effect of the drug should be on our patient. Then first thing Thursday morning at 6:00am we have our first patient-yikes! After trying not to kill our patients Thursday we get to come home and write a huge clinical report to turn in first thing Friday morning. Friday is also our medical dosage calculation test that if we don't pass with a 90% we get exited out of the program...don't be envious, sounds fun doesn't it?

So far we have learned how to chart both on paper and in the computer, to administer medication, we got certified to do blood glucose screenings, and checked of on (bp) as well as apical pulses. It is getting late and I know I have learned more skills than that but I can't think of them right now.

I am grateful that I am able to go to school and finish my education. I am also so grateful for Andrew for his support as well as our families who have been so concerned and helpful. When I survive this week, I'll have to let you know how it goes.


Chris and Lisa said...

I have been wondering how you were doing and I am glad to read your update. I know you are under an incredible amount of stress but you seem to be managing it all so well. Forget about what the "old Tiffani" would have done and remember that for a little while, you might have to do things differently. Let people help when they can and don't feel bad about it - i learned that lesson a long time ago. By the way....did you ever hire someone to clean your house?? That would be the first thing I would let go....hahahaha!!! You are doing great, keep up the good work and just remember, it isn't forever.

Kristin said...

That would really crack me up if you got someone to clean your house! Ill bet you would be super picky about it! HA! However, she is totally right. Simplify as much as possible! And let the house go! Don't do the dishes or vaccum, take that time to spend with Carson or take a bath if you can squeeze it in, and if the choice is even there. And please let me know if there is anything I can do to help! I think you are amazing for taking all of this on!

The Goulding Family said...

wow. You are such a busy girl!! It was good to see you the other night. Eventhough you couldn't stay too long. I am sorry that you are stressed. Keep up the running...that always makes me feel better too:)

mamasuisse said...

I love your stress kit. I saved the picture to print out and have in my kitchen and office. If I can actually reach the unconsciousness level, I'm sure it will help a lot.

I love that you feel such a responsibility to take nursing school seriously. Let me know where you're working when you finish school - that's where I'll go when I need medical attention!

I second Lisa's advice to let some things go and don't feel bad about it. I got to this point when I started working from home with 4 children to care for. I finally had to accept that I just can't do it all and that's okay. And my husband had to start doing MORE! It sounds like you're doing a great job.

Wedding Flowers By Brittany said...

You poor thing. Im sorry life is soo stressfull. When ever you want you can come see your Massage Therapist (ME!) so that you can relax. And let me make dinner for you guys this week. Come over on Tuesday and i will make dinner. if you can't do that then im going to bring you dinner!!!!! i will call you!!! my mom always says this, so i will pass it to you..... just keep smiling! love ya

The Lamb Family said...

Transitioning is so hard. I know what you mean. I'm struggling with staying home after working lots of hours before Caylee came. I'm grateful to be able to stay home with her, but I need to find something before I go crazy. Good luck with everything!

Julia Kelly said...

All of this stress will be so worth it right?? Hang in there. and BTW love your new background. Too cute.

Bratton Family said...

Hi Tiffani,
You don't know me, but I happen to be looking around at blogs and came across yours. Hope you don't mind me commenting on your blog.... :)
Just want you to know that nursing school does get better and you do get more comfortable. I'm a third semester nursing student and although it is still stressful, you will look back and laugh at the small things you were stressed about during 1st semester. TRUST ME! I remember our instructors making such a big deal out of changing beds,emptying catheters, and common ADL's for patients. They had many of us panic'd when we had to pass off on making a bed. No one really cares how you make a bed in the 'real world'. No one really cares how you help a client brush their teeth. Blood pressure on the other hand is a big deal but they have machines in the real world. (Not that you shouldn't know how to do it without the machine.)
I don't have a life either and all I do is study as well. My classmates and I talk about what I like to call 'situational depression of nursing school'. You feel completely stressed out all of the time and that balancing act doesn't come as easy as everyone makes it seem. I've learned to let my house be a little messy and let a couple things that really aren't that important in the grand skeem of things go.
This is temporay and it will get better. This semester so far has been the best for me. Things are starting to become clearer and I understand a lot more. I have a long way to go's getting better for me and it will get better for you!!!
Good luck with everything!

The Evers Family said...

All I can say is that I have a tremendous amount of respect for nurses. I think that if anyone can do it it's you. You are amazing and so organized! I know the feeling of leaving your baby. It is really hard. If I could help at all please let me know! Good luck with school Tiffany!!