Today I happily agreed to watch baby Nash for several hours while his mom worked but I'll admit I was more than a little worried about how it would go being responsible for not one but two children. Realizing that whether I am ready or not this whole "responsibility for more than one" is approaching rather quickly so I knew that it would be a good idea to test the waters.
Of course, Carson was thrilled anticipating Nash's arrival, "Baby Nash, my house?!!" When Nash arrived, Carson immediately checked him out, rocked him and sang him "twinkle-twinkle little star" while I made lunch--talk about great helper! I also enjoyed Carson's amusement at Nash's bodily functions, he thought they were hilarious! The best part was when I was able to get Nash to sleep and Carson down for a nap at the same time! I was pretty proud of myself. Now I know that on a permanent basis things wouldn't go this smoothly but it was a little boost of confidence that maybe it won't be so bad. I totally trust Carson and I think that alone will make the transition easier knowing that he is gentle and caring and that he won't try to hit the baby or stick random objects in her mouth will at least allow me to shower-I hope!
This brings me to my next point. I am happy to be having another baby but it just hit me that my days with just Carson are coming to an end and I am getting sad that it won't just be Carson and I anymore and I know that I am going to miss our "special" time together....ok I am seriously crying right now! He will always be my baby but in many ways he is not a baby anymore but having another baby is kind if bittersweet. Am I being over-emotional or totally lame for feeling this way, I don't think I am but who knows. I need to get it together so that's all for now.
3 comments:
I remember that feeling all too well - only mine came a whole lot sooner. It seemed wrong that it took us 8 1/2 years to get pregnant with Grant and then when he was just still a baby, only 16 1/2 mos old...I would be the mom of two kids. It was so bittersweet! Grateful for another baby...sad that I felt like my time with Grant was way too short.
In the end...it all works out as it is meant to be. Soon you will not remember life without your little girl.
You can always do what TJ and I do. We have TJ Mommy Dates. He and I L-O-V-E them. He gets all excited for a date with mommy!
Totally understand and feel the same way. It's nice to be able to give pretty much all your attention to the one. I'm just going to try and include mine as my "helper" as much as possible and hope that will help the transition, for both of us!
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